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Home Opinion & Editorial Opinion

Child and good habits

Riyatullah Farooqui by Riyatullah Farooqui
August 21, 2023

It is hard to deny that we spoil our own children, and when those terrible habits become their second nature, we begin “correcting” them. Isn’t it preferable to instill good habits at an early age? For instance, we begin carrying the baby in our arms unnecessarily. Even at this young age, the child is intelligent enough to understand that lap is the greatest form of pleasure. So till you pick him up, he begins to wail for being carried on your lap. However, he starts sobbing all over again when you put him on the swing or bed. And holding the baby in arms all the time is not just possible for parents.

As things stand, you simply cannot grant the child’s wish, and sobbing becomes his lifelong routine, which triggers psychiatric issues in children at a very young age. After a while, you begin taking him occasionally outdoors to the porch or street as he gets a bit older and learns to walk. He instantly realizes that the actual pleasure is outside because you perform this work so frequently. He now begins to cry for it because he is unaware that going outside is not always possible. It’s just going to end in tears because it’s hard to keep up with the child’s whims all the time. He suffers as a result of his crying, which exacerbates his mental health issues.

I did not inculcate such habits in my children. I carried them in my arms barely enough to avoid making them accustomed to it. Same goes with taking them outside of the house. Regarding the teenagers, my three sons were raised with the idea of doing their own work. As a result, their mother never polished their school shoes after they turned six, and after they became twelve, she stopped ironing their clothes. They perform all their labor themselves, and today they don’t even ask for water; if you feel thirsty, you get up and drink water.

Mother would bring the food for them, but they would do the dishes themselves. When both of my sons got married and my daughters-in-law came, this behavioral advantage came to forth. As we all know, every household’s “chief maid” is the poor daughter-in-law. She is responsible for all domestic chores.

However, my family does not adhere to this culture. My sons haven’t transformed my daughters-in-law into maids; although they serve and look after their spouses. For instance, when we need to clean up the dishes from the table, our lads take the initiative rather than sitting like the Nawabs. Why? Can’t they command their wives? Of course, they can but since they have been doing their own labor from a young age. Thus, after marriage, they still do a lot of their own work themselves.

People often claim that ladies only dress up when they go out. How could they dress nicely at home? Why would they squander brand-new garments in the kitchen, where your Nawab son throws them into tasks every two minutes? And why would she wear make-up while working out in the kitchen? First balance the system of your home and then analyze if your partner gets dressed up for you or not. Women enjoy dressing up. Give her a chance to indulge in her interest and preference!

It ought to be realized that our daughters-in-law are just like our daughters. They also need to learn the most important things of the new phase of life after marriage. The most crucial lesson young girls need to learn is that a woman who keeps a baby at home in diapers is an “incompetent mother.” Diapers should only be used when you are taking the child out of the house. What could be crueler to an innocent kid than having to carry his urine, etc., around for several hours each day? God is my witness, when I visit someone at their home and they place their diaper-wearing baby in my lap, I wince and swiftly remove him.  

Today’s inept mothers lack the gumption to realize that just because a child has pooped in a diaper; it doesn’t mean that they are not unclean. Since the stench doesn’t permeate the entire house, you don’t care that he is simply carrying the filth on his body. For the love of God, keep kids out of diapers at home. The child urinates frequently at a young age, thus it is only natural that the numerous pajamas and garments placed on plastic become soiled. Then what? Mothers must endure this inconvenience because, for good reasons, Paradise lies at their feet. We should certainly look for Paradise beneath the feet of diaper company owners rather than our mothers if our babies have to carry filth in their diapers.

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